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Artists Who Fall off the Stage

11 April 2009 525 views 3 Comments

There is an epidemic sweeping the music world. Singers in concert, with hordes of their fans cheering them on, take a crucial misstep in their careers and literally fall from grace!

Yes, the stage is a very small place indeed, only several square yards, and many an artist, in the throes of either sincere musical expression or affected posturing, lives life dangerously close to the edge.

From former presidential candidate Bob Dole to countless runway models and Miss USAs, it seems pretty clear that no amount of fame can keep you immune from the inexorable strength of that tyranical god–gravity.

Which leads us to the cringe-worthy videos below. I really don’t know why, but it is just hilarious to see famous people falling over!

However hot the girl is or howevermuch street cred the hardened rapper has, they are humanized in these moments which, thanks to modern technology, will steadily increase in YouTube viewcounts ad infinitum. If it were anyone else falling over, we’d be immediately concerned with their well-being, but for some reason, a celebrity’s physical “lowering”  to “the level” of “the groundlings”  is also an instantaneous social leveling which reveals a definite amount of envy mixed in with our adoration…

#1: Joaquin Phoenix falls off the Stage

Acclaimed actor Joaquin Phoenix made headlines after a bizarre Letterman appearance where his monosyllabic replies, bushy beard and budding rap career made him the butt of hollywood jokes. Some suspected a drawn-out publicity stunt, but this video shows Phoenix at one of his debut rap performances:

#2 Beyonce Falls off the Stage

The popular songstress ate it hard at this Orlando concert:

#3 Lil Wayne Falls off the Stage

Lil Wayne’s success is a sad commentary on the musical tastes of modern youth…but luckily the gods were so offended by his sonic outrages they snuck a karmic banana peel onstage….Wayne reportedly has $150,000 worth of diamonds attached to his teeth (not making this up) which surely saved the young rapper’s choppers from being knocked out during this spill:

#4 Metallica’s Jason Newstead falls in concert

Erstwhile Metallica bassist Jason Newstead has had a tough time of it. Recently replaced by Robert Trujillo and never quite able to step out of the shadow of original bassist Cliff Burton, Newstead had to endure being the “outsider” throughout Metallica’s most mainstream days. Here, falls onstage and hilariously continues playing as a sort of “i meant to do that” reflex:

#5 Jennifer Lopez’s Close Call

A conveyor belt + an elevated stage + J Lo anyone? But what sounds like the perfect storm for this post is sadly thwarted by the singer’s nimble recovery. (Although her massive gluteal cushion would likely have provided enough padding to prevent any injury…)

#6 The Jonas Brothers’ Repeated Falls

The Jonas Brothers’ saccharine-pop-rock stylings are clearly a form of noise pollution, and yet their clean cut looks and simple songs have fueled the unspeakable fantasies of a legion of pre-pubescent whitebread admirers.

As for falling onstage–the tween heartthrobs have done it so many times that a fan actually put together a compilation clip:

#7 Akon Oversteps His Bounds

Modern R&B juggernaut Akon’s voice  is as smooth as buttah. Unfortunately, so was the floor at at this concert:

#8 The Game Steps Up…and is Humbled

The rapper known as the Game appeard on the scene destined for success. He was after all, the product of the 50 Cent-Eminem-Dre hit factory, but his rhymes tended toward boasting about rims, his shoe collection and various shots out to mentors…

When watching this video, you could say the comeuppance of hubris has triumphed over streetwise braggadocio, but because the Game plays off the fall with just the right mix of charm and swagger, I wouldn’t call this one a total fail…

#9 John Petrucci’s Slide Guitar

John Petrucci’s soulless technical shred guitar work in Dream Theater has made him a fixture of the prog-speed metal underground. But his neither his lightning fast hands nor his metronome could have prepared him for the wiles of his arch-nemesis: a slippery floor:

#10 Mya Wipes Out

Faded R&B crooner Mya’s best performances may be behind her, but her behind’s best performances are clearly yet to come!

#11 Method Man Misses the Mark

Wu-Tang stalwart Method Man loses his balance, flails, then decides why fight it? He falls, yes, but it’s all good–his homies in the audience have literally “got his back”.

#12 Bonus Fall: Yes, A Horse!

The nauseating level of pretension at a fashion show is unquestionably the perfect location for a fall. But models tripping is passe…we need animals dammit! And here we have horse proudly strutting down the catwalk until…well, watch for yourself:

The best thing about this clip is how calm and collected the horse is compared to the hysterical onlookers. No embarrassed apology or awkward recovery here, just one chill, laid back steed…

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3 Comments »

  • absinthechamber said:

    if only kanye would fall over…

  • mitchelle said:

    they ait lust some videos are stupid like a horse falling off stage what is a damn horse doing on a stage anyway

  • monique said:

    they are funny but emberassing my favorite one is the jonas brothers video

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